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Last Updated:
Sep 10th, 2007 - 18:59:21
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Question
Hi, I am 18 years old, and I've had a pretty messed up menstrual cycle since I first started when I was 13. I've gone back and forth from hypo to hyperactive thyroid for the past 4 years. When I was 16 I had a cyst burst on my ovary without even knowing I had it. Two years ago I went through a stage of anorexia and bulemia, which I was treated for in an eating disorder program. Recently I noticed a lump on my lower left hand side that bothers me often with a sharp pain. I haven't had a regular period for a while. I often feel that I have to use the restroom, and a lot of times I cant even go...and yes that's both functions. I also began spotting blood the other day thinking that it was the begining of my period and it hasn't come yet. Today I noticed the blood was dark brown almost like a black purple color. I will be honest and say I'm not a virgin. My boyfriend and I do have sex often, and I'm not on the pill...however I do use protection. Often times during sex it hurts more than it feels good. It almost feels as if I'm being poked in the bladder or stomach. If there is anything you can tell me about this please do. Thank you for your time and I hope to be hearing from you soon.
Jacquie
Answer
Dear Jacquie,
You have brought up a number of issues—I think they all need to be addressed. Without being able to see you and conduct a detailed interview and examination, I’m afraid I wont be able to give you any definitive answers. But allow me to make some observations and suggestions.
You mention a number of issues that suggest a possible diagnosis of Polycystic Ovarian Disease (PCOD). You note that you have irregular periods (“messed up menstrual cycle”), ovarian cysts, and long cycles (“haven’t had a regular period for a while”). All of these symptoms are consistent with this PCOD. This is a medical condition associated with various hormonal problems as well as pain and infertility. Many doctors will recommend the birth control pill for this—but “the pill” does not cure this problem, it simply masks many of the symptoms. This problem can be effectively treated in many cases through surgery. I would encourage you to seek out a Gynecologist trained in NaPro Technology to discuss your options for treatment.
You noted that you’ve had problems with eating disorders over the years. Nutritional factors can certainly affect you menstrual cycles, as well as the over-all health and function of your body. I would encourage you to seek out a physician to help you make sure that your eating disorder is under control. This condition can be effectively treated.
If you have thyroid disease, you need regular follow-up with your doctor. Your thyroid needs to be appropriately adjusted and monitored. Thyroid medication needs to be taken daily on an empty stomach—if not, its absorption will be irregular, and your thyroid function will be “up and down”. Thyroid malfunction can cause menstrual cycle irregularities, prolonged bleeding and spotting, as well as other problems such as constipation, diarrhea, weight gain or loss, and skin and hair problems.
You mentioned that the sexual activity you have with your boyfriend is painful. This can be caused by various problems, including pelvic infections, endometriosis, and ovarian cysts. You would need to see a doctor for a complete pelvic exam and cultures to properly diagnose this problem. I would encourage you to do this.
In addition, you noted that you have sex often with your boyfriend, but that “it hurts more than it feels good…” This concerns me. Why do you engage in intercourse when it causes you pain? Certainly in a committed marriage relationship, both spouses receive not only pleasure, but also a deepening of their love for each other. Without the commitment, though, sex becomes all about feeling good physically—and you’re not even getting that. I’m concerned that you are being used by your boyfriend. Does he tell you that he is using you? Though he may not use those words, his actions are saying just that. His actions are telling you that he likes having sex with you (it feels good for him), but doesn’t want to commit to caring for you, protecting you, staying with you, always being there for you—basically, he doesn’t want to commit to loving you. Does he say he loves you? If he doesn’t, at least he’s honest with you… but there is no future in that relationship—he cannot make you happy, so why waste your time on that relationship? If he does say he loves you, then make him prove it: real love makes a commitment. I love my wife and children. I will always be there for them. No matter how much pain or suffering it cost me, I would never abandon them. I will work hard every day to keep them secure and happy and healthy. I would give my life for them. Jacquie, you deserve that kind of love. And you should insist on it. Any man who uses you for his pleasure cannot give you that kind of love. The longer you stay in that kind of relationship, the more you destroy your own self esteem; and you will eventually start to believe that you don’t deserve that kind of love. When this happens, you are virtually guaranteed to eventually marry the wrong kind of man. Make a change, Jacquie. Turn things around. Recognize your own amazing dignity as a woman. Start searching right now for a man who can give you the kind of relationship that brings happiness, security and intimacy. You will find that there is so much more to sex than how it makes you feel physically.
Dr. Gisla
John Gisla, MD, NFPMC is Board Certified by the American Academy of Family Physicians,
and Certified as a Medical Consultant for Natural Family Planning and NaPro Technology
by the Pope Paul VI Institute. He is on staff at Mercy of Folson Hospital and on the NFP Advisory
Board for the Diocese of Sacramento. He has been married ten years and has two daughters and a son.
© Copyright 2005 by CANFP
The information on this page and web site is for informational purposes only,
and is not a substitute for medical diagnosis and treatment by a physician.
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